Must Love Dogs
Aw yeah, going back to basics with an old-school style jabber post. Not since Bo Derek took her love of horses too far has a celebrity taken their love of a specific type of animal too far (although I don’t know which was first, chronologically.) Like the Derek incident, this is some old-ass news, but since anything bestiality themed brings the rubes in droves, it was a no-brainer.
Because not only has Debra Winger taken her love of German Shepherds too far, she has taken her defense of Roman Polanski too far as well. She is a multifaceted line-crosser, that Debra. When asked about the recent arrest of said director, she had this to say*:
We can’t understand the mind of genius! Look at Woody Allen! Sure he took nude photographs of his teen-aged step-daughter while she slept. But why do you think he did that? Because… geniuses act differently than the rest of us! They are like animals at the state fair. When they are ready to copulate, when they need to copulate, you don’t hinder them! You don’t walk up to a donkey at the state fair and tell him not to mount his donkey friend. He has to mount his donkey friend!
*as reported by The Daily Rash, a very reputable source that does NOT generate fake news stories.
Oh, THAT'S why.
But back to the subject at hand. What is it about the forbidden pleasures of canine coitus that women find so alluring? One possible answer comes in the form of poem entitled, Women Who Sleep With Dogs, by Rita Clagett.
Men hate us.
We have, somehow, they think, rejected them.
They think, perhaps, we’re lesbian
(how that equates I cannot comprehend).
It’s true, we sleep with dogs instead of men -
we sleep with dogs because they are our friends.
Is that really the reason, Rita? Do you think we as men are going to stand idly by and become the scapegoat for the aberrant sexual desires of womankind? And if so, are you then going to try to copulate with that scapegoat, thinking it a potential partner of the four-legged variety? Much like Occam before me, I prefer a much simpler answer. From Answers.com:
It gives great pleasure to a woman to have a hot dog penis fill their vagina’s.
See? So simple, yet so eloquent. A much more satisfactory answer, says I. Who cares what people will think? Let them cluck their tongues and shake their heads. Love on, sweet Debra, love on…
