Let’s face it, the Academy Awards get lamer every year. They’re long, boring- and with the expansion of the best picture category to ten- quickly losing their relevance. The only thing that keeps me watching is the office Oscar pool. If it weren’t for gambling, I’d never watch the Oscars again.
Which is why Mr. Skin’s Anatomy Awards are such a breath of fresh, unclothed air. What exactly are The Anatomy Awards, you ask? Why, only the most respected celebration of onscreen nudity to ever grace the internet. I can’t believe they are in their 12th year already. Is the internet even 12 years old?
Run by the venerable Mr. Skin, an O.G. in the celebrity skin game, The Anatomy Awards highlight such overlooked achievements in film as Best Nudecomer, Best Lesbian Scene, and Breast Picture. Not only that, YOU get to pick the winners. Click HERE to view clips of the nominudes and then cast your vote with your scrote! Apparently you can win an iPad (although we all win when an actress takes off her clothes. Unless that actress is Kathy Bates.)
The nominudes for Breast Picture are:
Piranha 3D (it does have a lot of ‘em)
Chloe (the other sexy, lesbian arthouse flick)
Love and Other Drugs (crappy rom-com featuring the glorious globes of Anne Hathaway)
Boogie Woogie (whatever the fuck that is)
Lake Placid 3D (hahaha, who knew they even made a part 2?)
Remember the pert-breasted teen who got her mom to sign off on letting her ride nakers on a roller coaster for charity? Yeah, well so do hundreds of other perverts, because they all wrote in to Egotastic to find out just who the hell she was. Turns out, she’s not a child, she just has the body of one, and she wants to show it to you.
I, for one, want to see it, but this kind of ruins the fantasy of the 16 year-old whose mom is so cool she has a pussy tattoo and engages in naked activities with her daughter. It also makes you realize that although this is done under the guise of charity, this chick is just another fame-hungry whore milking her 15 minutes by taking off her clothes. I guarantee she is an actress, and thinks she can parlay naked roller coaster riding into a career in television. I know that’s how Meryl Streep got her break, but come on. It doesn’t work for everyone. Click on the pic for that sweet, delusional cooter pie.
Recently a bunch of limey Brits doffed their kit and rode the dragon (alligator?) for charity. Wackiness ensued (in my brain).
Check out the uncensored pics in all their wrinkly-titted, saggy-assed glory at whatever the fuck Anorak News is. I think it’s some Eskimo celebrity news site.
Another Film I’ve Seen That Contains Underage Nudity, another shower scene. I guess you can get away with this in an American film.
I know Hollywood has a history of luring talented foreign directors into her clutches and convincing them to helm far more conventional fare, but how did this happen? In 1985, Serbian art house provocateur Dusan Makavejev (W.R.: Mysteries of the Organism , Sweet Movie) directed an Australian set romantic comedy about cola starring Eric Roberts. Not weird enough for you? It contained a mother/daughter shower scene starring the smokin’ Greta Scacchi (see previous post) and a 6 year-old Rebecca Smart (making her just a few years too young for the tastes of this cinephile.) Not only does it blow my mind that Makavejev got away with this in a studio film (although the scene was cut from some early VHS releases), but according to the IMDB, Coke had no problem with it either!
This film was produced without the knowledge or consent of the international offices of the Coca-Cola Company. However, since both the company and its product were depicted so favorably in the film (as well as the film being free advertising), they took no legal action against the parties involved.
Hey, as long as Coke looks good. Basically, this means Coca-Cola has NO problem with this:
Mommy, why is that man filming us?
Click the above pic for additional stills which I was not gutsy enough to post. They are located at the Max Cinema forum, which seems to center disturbingly around nubile young girls appearing nude in “legal” films. Remember, the materials you are about to view were distributed by MGM, so you can’t be prosecuted for child pornography. Scacchi is smokin’ hot in this scene, but depending on your tastes, the presence of young Ms. Smart will either be the icing on the cake, or send your penis shriveling up inside your body. I’ll leave you to it. Good night, and good luck.
Posted in Film, Underage Pussy
Tagged Australia, Child Pornography, Coca-Cola, Dusan Makavejev, Eric Roberts, Greta Scacchi, Nudity, Rebecca Smart, Shower Scenes, Sweet Movie, The Coca Cola Kid, WR
Via The Superficial:
Tickle the donkey's chin for the asstacular NSFW version
…and then I’m gonna drink that shit. Coco beware!
Coco ain't got nothin' on me!
Click on Jumbo for the full gallery of uncensored pics
You know what’s great about Europe? The lack of shame. Where else can a grizzled old dude strut around town in tattoo underwear with his baby arm hanging out? It is an inalienable right- alongside life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. In fact, in the Declaración de Independencia, the term pursuit of happiness is replaced with pursuit of being a horny old dude with a piece like a fleshy tire iron. La búsqueda de ser un viejo tipo córneo con un pedazo tiene gusto de un hierro de neumático carnudo. Look it up.
It goes without saying, these pics are NSFW. It’s like feeding time at the reptile house. Seriously, it looks like dude is putting a leg lock on an anteater. The thing’s practically prehensile. If you ask nicely, maybe he’ll even let you feed it some peanuts.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Anteater, Baby Arm, Dick Tattoos, Elephant Cock, Europe, Inalienable Rights, Naked Old People, Nudists, Nudity, Prehensile Penis, Pursuit of Happiness, Spain, Tattoo Underwear