Over a year ago it was announced that Canadian auteur David Cronenberg was attached to direct The Matarese Circle, a starring vehicle for Tom Cruise and Denzel Washington based on the novel by Robert Ludlum. Ugh. I immediately sat down and wrote an open letter to David (HERE), begging him to reconsider. Only 57 people read that post, but he must have been one of them, because guess what? He dropped that turd in favor of three cool-ass projects.
A DANGEROUS METHOD: Although it sounds like a bad Michelle Pfeiffer movie, this is actually about a psycho-sexual love triangle between Freud, Jung, and some chick played by Keira Knightly. Based on the stage play The Talking Cure, this has the potential to venture into Crash/Dead Ringers territory. The casting of Viggo and Fassbender is spot on, and almost makes up for the presence of Surfboard McLockjaw.
COSMOPOLIS: An adaptation of the Don Delillo novel about a young, urban professional on his way across town in a stretch limo to get a haircut. That’s right. Colin Farrell returns to the realm of confined spaces. but Phonebooth this is not. This is a slice of genius pie. Wait for the cream.
AS SHE CLIMBED ACROSS THE TABLE: An adaptation of the novel by Motherless Brooklyn author, Jonathan Lethem. ASCATT is about yet another love triangle, this time between two academics and a laboratory created black hole. Say what? You wanted cream? THERE’S YOUR FUCKING CREAM!
A Dangerous Method is currently in production. Those other two better fucking happen. You hear me, David?